A group of geologists have found a way to fund their research by prospecting for Jolly Rancher ore while on the field.
Experts in the field were alerted to the sweet turn of events earlier this week when Dr. Quincy Quartzing, the flinty but respected leader of the research group, declared their findings. 'Never in my wildest dreams did I suspect that the sweet taste of Jolly Ranchers would be linked to geology,' said Dr. Quartzing. 'This is truly groundbreaking.'
The researchers were initially conducting surveys for common minerals when they stumbled upon deposits of what seemed like candy in the strata. 'At first, we thought some kids were having a laugh, burying their candy in our dig site,' said Dr. Sandra Shale, another member of the team. But when the tongue-tingling samples kept turning up across multiple sites, they realized they were onto something different.
The Jolly Rancher ore, affectionately named Candyite, is found in layers of hardened sucrose and fruity essences, infused under pressure into geological formations. 'It's like the earth literally sweats sweet stuff,' said Dr. Shalenburg.
The revelation has not only set the scientific community abuzz but also attracted sweet-toothed adventurers to the site, eager to get their hands on literal candy rocks. As a result, the research team has inadvertently created a profitable business model, with Candyite specimens selling like warm donuts, generating an unexpected revenue stream for their research. 'It's just like panning for gold, except it's Jolly Ranchers and it's delicious,' commented one ecstatic prospector, chewing happily on a cherry-flavored piece of the geological confectionery.
'We've always known that earth gives us precious resources, but who knew it could also satisfy our candy cravings,' said Dr. Quartzing, whose innovative approach to geology has taken the world by a delightfully sugary storm. 'It's a minefield of mouth-watering possibilities."
The scientific community is still processing the implications of Candyite. The Geological Society, while expressing their fascination, hinted at further inquiries to verify the findings and to explore the possibilities of other sugary troves buried in the earth's mantle. 'If there's one thing this development has shown us, it's that science can be surprizingly sweet,' Dr. Quartzing concluded in a crisp, candy-esque note.
Based on: The Palaeontological Association