In an unexpected move today, Instagram, the photo-sharing colossus, announced a seismic change in its naming policy: a user may now have only one underscore in their username. Pandemonium ensued as influencers, meme enthusiasts, and an untold number of users named "___icanteven" found their once underscore-riddled identities stripped down to a singular, unadorned line.
"This is an unprecedented act of discrimination against underscores," lamented @Sammy___SparklesStar___, now forcibly rechristened as @Sammy_SparklesStar. "I only used the damned thing because Instagram have my name to someone else."
Some see this move as Instagram's method of dealing with the underscore inflation that has hit the platform in recent years. "You know the value of an underscore really dropped when people started using three or four of them in their usernames," explained social media analyst Janine McAdams. "It's basic economics, really."
Underscore enthusiasts have already taken to the digital streets to protest this newfound character limit. Hastags like #UnderscoreUnlimited and #MoreThanOne have started trending, while a Change.org petition titled "Let our underscores be free!" has already racked up an impressive number of digital signatures.
Instagram, for their part, remains firm in their decision. In a brief statement, they explained, "We believe this change will allow users to create more meaningful connections with others by focusing less on their underscores and more on their content."
One user, formerly @pleaselookatme071220036590245761234, rejoiced, "I'm just glad they didn't ban numbers. I don't know what I would have done if they'd taken away my birthdate, social security, and bank PIN from my username."
As the world adapts to this new era of underscore austerity, only time will tell how it impacts Instagram's underscore-abundant community. And, of course, the biggest question on everyone's mind: will Twitter be the next to enforce an underscore limit? Only time, and perhaps one underscore, will tell.
